Friday, March 12, 2010

Wee Wee Hours

It's 3 am. I've been awake since about 1:30 and got tired of lying in bed, waiting to go back to sleep. I seem to have a lot on my mind tonight (this morning) and my brain won't relax.

Things are starting to get busy again at work. Marking, writing learning materials for next year, student registration, more marking. I spent all yesterday afternoon in a meeting and when I left, my to-do list had doubled.

I'm headed to Calgary later this morning to observe International Baccalaureate students at a history colloquium - and I can't find the email that tells me where it's being held. I hope my colleague has the information or we'll be wandering the university campus looking for it. Sigh.

I'm dancing in a show on Saturday. I'm not sure I'm ready for it - I don't feel I know the choreography well enough - but my dance teacher has convinced me to do it anyway. Butterflies in my stomach.

A Tisket a Tasket has been sitting on my sewing machine since last Friday and I haven't done much more than give it a glance. Where did my motivation go? I wonder if it's just the weather...


The OnlyChild has had a blue funky week. She's one of the stage managers for the school play and she's feeling a bit underappreciated and abused. Some of the students she's working with are real prima donnas and have been quite rude to her. And she doesn't feel she's getting any credit for the hard work she's done over the past few weeks. Unfortunately, I can relate. We both tend to do what we have to do in the background and don't draw attention to ourselves; then we feel resentful because noone notices us.

I'm starting another master's course at the beginning of May. I can't skip another term because this course is mandatory for the program, and if I don't get to it, the degree will never be finished.

I have to find time to go to the bank to wire the deposit for my apartment in Paris. The thought of spending all this money on myself is starting to make me feel a little sick and selfish. Guilt is settling in.

People (meaning me) probably should resist the urge to blog at three in the morning. Being awake during the wee wee hours makes one morose and depressed. I'd go back to bed, but why? I have to be up in about an hour and a half anyway.

I think I might go and bake something...

12 comments:

Tonya's Sewing Room said...

i'm up with you....mine have something to do with the fact that I slept all day yesterday with that migraine.

Tangos Trash and Treasures said...

Bummer you couldn't sleep! Hope it's a great day for you!
Your worth the trip to Paris!!

Kaye said...

been there--done that. Don't feel guilty about the trip, you deserve it, you work for it

Pat said...

Well...golly...I was wide awake most of last night, too...and considered going online. If I'd known you were awake, too, I'd have done it and we could have emailed back and forth. Do NOT feel guilty about your trip...you have worked hard to be able to fulfill this dream, so just relax about it and enjoy it. I hope you aren't wondering around Calgary with your colleague this a.m finding out you don't know where you are supposed to be!!! (I may be doing that tonight for a diocesan convention in the town where my church is located...as the communication by the organizers on the diocesan level has been very poor.)

PunkiePie said...

Hugs Rachel! You sound so down in the dumps! I think you need some Spring and sewing. I hope you get both soon. And don't feel bad about the Paris trip. You've worked hard. You deserve it!

Thimbleanna said...

Awww, sorry you're so blue Rachel! I think it's that time of year -- hang in there -- before you know it, you'll be in PARIS!!!

Pokey said...

Not worried about much, are you? Wow, what a list. Sorry, Rachel, I can sympathize with you and you daughter on so many accounts! As they say, the darkest hour is before the dawn, it is so easy to be even gloomier in the night. Here's to better days...and your trip! Enjoy!

Sara said...

If I would have known you were up - we could have just e-mailed or chatted with each other on yahoo. I was up...too...

Barb said...

Baking sound good...the family will wake up to some fresh rolls?

You do have alot on your plate, no wonder you can't sleep...and you deserve Paris....so no guilt!!

goldenbird said...

I can relate to your post ... I've been up since 4am and can't get back to sleep, even though it's Saturday and I wanted to sleep in a bit. I hope you are feeling better by now and not as overwhelmed, but wow, you do have so much on your plate. I'm a quiet background person, too. Please don't feel guilty about Paris, it is such a wonderful opportunity and you deserve it.

Dogwood said...

You make me laugh. Up at 3:00am and blogging. You are busy. I know how it is when you can not get your brain to turn off. Oug...makes falling asleep so hard. Anyway, Paris!!!! Yipee...

Have a really fun weekend.

Isabelle said...

Oh dear, poor you! I would never bake at 3 am. Too exciting! Hope you got a better night the next time.