Yes, I know it's only Tuesday, but it's been a difficult week so far.
Sunday night, I had an awful sleep. I tossed and turned, sweated and froze, felt sick to my stomach. Yesterday morning, I woke up still feeling sick and with a pounding headache. Given the choice between calling a sub and making lesson plans for the day or sucking it up and going to work, I opted for the latter. Usually if I'm not feeling well, once I get busy with students and classes, I don't even think about it.
But...when I got to school yesterday, it just got worse. I received some very, very bad news.
When I started working at my school, six years ago, I had a fresh batch of grade ten students in my advisee group. One of them was a sweet girl from Belarus. She stayed with me until the middle of grade 12 when she switched to a school that was closer to where she lived. She had been having some difficulties at home and had moved into a group home earlier in the school year and was finding the commute too long. We stayed in touch after she left the school; she would drop in and visit every once in a while and once brought me some gifts after a trip back to Europe. It had been a year or so, though, since I last saw her.
Over the weekend, she committed suicide. She was 20 years old. As you can imagine, I am just beside myself. I don't even know how to feel - sad, of course, but also angry and dismayed. Her mother had recently started working at our school, taking on a maternity leave position, so the shock has hit more than her former teachers; it has also affected our entire school community. Kat's funeral is scheduled for Thursday morning. If you're the praying type (and I'm really not myself), please say a prayer for her and her family.
I'll be back in a few days.